Wrestling a Dragon
One of my friends is at a place in her life when it’s time for her to decide… does she move forward to do what she is called to do, or does she continue trying to stay safely where she is in her comfort zone?
She might choose the comfort zone, except that the Universe has been throwing her some serious curve balls. It’s as though she’s isn’t going to be allowed to stay put. Literally or figuratively. In fact, her latest challenge is that her lease is up, and the landlord gave her 30 days to move out because there’s a buyer for the house. Due to various reasons such as the down economy and her attempts to support her adult son’s erratic life choices (he finally left the nest about a year ago), this will be the fourth move she’s had to make in less than six years. Just when she thought the dust had settled, her stability is being disrupted again.
Why do such “bad” things happen to good people? I believe that sometimes, like in my friend’s case, it’s because we need a shakeup to get us to wake up and take action. It’s not the only reason why “bad” things happen, but in my friend’s case, it fits because I know what she’s avoiding. She knows what she’s avoiding, too. We’ve talked about it at length. It has to do with acting on what she’s being called to do vocationally.
There’s no doubt that she is being pressured, and if she doesn’t move forward, more pressure will be applied. My friend has a lot of stamina, and she’s pretty stubborn – qualities that have served her well in life but, in this case, are backfiring on her. She’s also a very self-accountable and self-aware person. She’s beginning to realize that she is the one standing in her own way – that she’s been doing what she calls “Wrestling a Dragon.” In other words, she’s been wrestling with her own mind.
We exchanged emails the other day. She wrote, “How do I give myself permission to go for it?”
I shared with her what I’ve learned about wrestling with the mind…
First of all, who needs to give you permission? That would be the mind, of course.
It’s the mind that is saying you need to ask permission to do whatever “wild and crazy” but wonderful thing you know you’re meant to do.
There are two parts to the mind. The part that is eager to carry out the Higher Self’s plan. It’s already all in.
The other half is the human-survival half. It’s the “I am coping with this sh** that I have to put up with in order to be a human” half.
It’s that second half of the mind that is saying, “I need to give/get permission.”
Here’s what I’ve learned you do to get your whole mind on board. You do the same kinds of things you do when you want to persuade anyone to do something… whether it’s a child, a colleague, a volunteer worker, etc. You talk about the benefits of doing x, and you get the person involved so he/she has skin in the game and cares about the result.
So basically, you work with the mind to get its agreement AND its assistance. You give the mind jobs to do to help make it happen. You tell it, “do this, analyze this, research this resource, etc.”
You also use the mind to imagine what it’s going to look like. You let it help you form the details in your “mind’s eye.” That’s another job you give it to do.
Keep it busy and engaged, and it will do less grumbling. But let’s be realistic… It won’t stop grumbling because THAT’S ITS JOB.
The third thing you do is just like when you’re working with a child or an employee – you give love and gratitude to the mind. When you’re actively and consciously working with it, you give it love and thank it for its assistance. When it challenges you with “Are you sure about this?” remember it does this because it’s simply trying to look out for your best interests. Again, it’s doing its job, and this is how it is being loving to you. Of all thing things you can do, giving the mind love and gratitude is the best. It calms the mind down and gets it to come on board.
When the whole mind is on board and has things to do to help, you will have accomplished “giving yourself permission.”
Then zoom… zoom… and you’re on your way!
See? There’s no wrestling needed!
Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they really are to what they do in life. http://about.me/angelarloeb